NC-18 (Nerdy Content from an 18-year-old): Stephen King’s IT
Ah, yes I remember it was late in the year when the halloween season was up and about. It was when I was eagerly searching for a novel to get myself in the right mood for the season. But my efforts were fruitless and so I slipped into the depths of melancholy finding that the burst of taste bud euphoria that came from the collection of sweets that received during trick ‘or treating could not alleviate myself. But then I received an email with the simple phrase “IT has arrived!” And so I rushed home and out of that dull cardboard amazon box arose my glorious novel. What was “IT” exactly? Smug devil Stephen King’s very own well... It. Inspired by the atmosphere that comes from All Hallow’s Eve, and the repeated incidents of pretentious teenagers scaring kids (and adults) with clown outfits I took it upon myself to read this cute little freak of nature. A text that chronicles the adventures of seven innocent people in their childhood and later adulthood. The novel tells of their quest to vanquish an ancient evil that dwells within their town that is devouring every child it comes across: the eponymous being simply called “It” that usually takes the form a clown. Yeah, good luck trying to hunt in this day and age, I mean we’ve practically turned coulrophobia into an art form. I think some of you less sober people are just dying to make a drinking game out of this book for every time the word it is mentioned. I don’t necessarily advise since this book is over *with the voice of Dr. Evil from Austin Powers* one-thouuusand pages. If you’re planning on indulging liqueur while reading this, you’ve got a lot to flip through, and you can’t do it if you’re dead and/or in rehab. Now, on with the review.
This tale begins with an innocent child (who just so happens to be the little brother to one of the main characters) merrily watching his paper boat travel down the sidewalk on a rain-soaked day, but tragedy strikes as his boat rushes to a nearby sewer opening and falls in. Sadly that’s not the only tragedy that happened on that day. As he’s hopelessly searching for his precious boat, something appears from inside the darkness: a clown. He Introduces himself as Pennywise, and then the clown offers to hand him his boat back (and balloon to go with it). And of course, the poor naive fool then reaches past the grate and predictably meets an untimely end.
OK, can we analyze the major problems with this course of action:
a.) Clown
b.) He’s talking to you from a frickin’ sewer (and his best excuse for this odd location is: “the storm blew the whole circus away”)
c.) is for clown
d.) Stranger Danger (who’s also offering you dubious goods)
e.) Clown
f.) CLOWN!!!
g.) HE’S A HOOVER DAM CLOWN!!!!!!
And to add to d.) just because you know his name doesn’t make him any less dangerous. If some kleptomaniac broke into your house; cornered you in your bedroom with a switchblade in hand; and then introduced himself as Harold, that doesn’t make your situation any more reassuring now doesn’t it. Regardless, I think this is a great opening to our tale. Whereas some fiction takes a while before anything of intrigue happens, this text just cuts to the chase. A little dash of character introduction and exposition later, all the sudden BOOM, bloody murder. Heck, I think this should be the new standard for all fiction; “Hey, wanna read some Jane Austen? Duh duh dunnnn”. Much later in the story, six particular people start to receive an ominous phone call from an old friend telling of the return of the malevolent entity they fought together as pre-teens in a group called the Loser’s Club (that’s some botched advertising right there, I mean you wouldn’t invest in a company called Bankruptcy Incorporated). Anyway, it (see what I did there) has returned to prey on the children of their childhood town, and that they must return to surcease the carnage once and for all. Will the monster be bested, or will it feed?
This text oft considered as one of his best works, and boy I see where they were going with it. The plot is enthralling as it can get but to me, the most striking thing about this is how it’s presented. The story is not just presented as in a straightforward manner like other stories. There are three timelines presented here: the 1957 timeline that chronicles the all the character’s childhoods; the Interlude that tells of one of the members - Mike Hanlon - as he’s confronted with the decision whether or not to bring the gang back together to face the monster; and the 1985 timeline which deals with the second confrontation between the Loser’s Club and It. The story is just beautifully connected and flows perfectly like canola oil on tinfoil. Characters are quirky and fun to read about, and not to mention relatable since they aren’t invincible macho men; they’re just average people. And it’s just one of those books with so much delicious imagery and great attention to deal that the imagination just flares up with colour and sheer beauty! However it’s insane attention to detail can get a bit overboard, as I sometimes came across events like one where the story would point out the contents of a medicine cabinet down to the last bottle. Yeah, this is why I take away time from shoveling my walks: to look at what some dunce has in his frickin’ medicine cabinet. Last but not least is that it rightfully deserve the label of horror whereas instead of just jumping at you, it keeps you in that uneasy tension that something is about to go wrong, and before you know it, the terror escalates. In fact, it’s so scary that the smug dipstick who wrote this has ruined a few things for me; stuff that I’ll never look at the same, and so starting now, for every King novel I’m going to keep a casualty list of everyday things that he’s ruined for me.
1. Clowns
2. Sewer systems
3. Balloons
4. Abandoned Houses
5. The word float and its derivatives
But in spite of all that, you know what… I love it all!
My Grade: Six adorkable kids out of Seven
