I might as well apologize for the delay again, but by now we’re all just tired of it. Anyway I’ve been thinking what I can do for this miserable piece of code besides vacation stories and I’ve got an idea. Pointless filler content which is nothing more than talking about and then grading works of entertainment that none of you would give a crap about. Well it’s better than nothing and besides if you’ve got any better ideas I’d like to hear them. But for now this nonsense will have to do.
Now, on with the main attraction.
We’ve all had that feeling when watching, reading, or playing a work of mystery and suspense: heartbeat quickening every second, sweat pouring down the forehead; glutes on the very edge of the seat! Many have entered into this gripping medium; some have succeeded, and some have failed. But few have done it better than this groundbreaking novel; so join me ask nag on about one of the most prolific story from the Queen of Crime herself.
[Some numbskull in the background:] “By golly man; how long are you going rant on about Patricia Cornwell.”
[Me:] NOT HER, YOU DUNCE -- THE OTHER ONE!!
It’s hard to talk about the genre without some soul mentioning Agatha Christie. Whether it be Hercule Poirot, Jane Marple or her other detectives, she has undeniably left an immeasurable impact on the genre, and touched the hearts of millions of readers like me and later, hopefully, you. Just weeks ago, I got to view her magnum opus. Looking at the title itself you know you're going to be in for a treat -- but in a way it practically ruins it. Still, it’s better than her previous one which was called Ten Little Indians (it was the 30’s what would you expect!) but the one before that was a lot worse. I MEAN, SERIOUSLY?! THAT DOESN’T SOUND TERRIFYING; THAT SOUNDS LIKE AN OFFENSIVE NURSERY RHYME! (Actually, it was a nursery rhyme, so, you win this round political incorrectness). Thankfully it has now been changed to Soldier Boys for the sake of preserving what little dignity white people have left.
This ain’t ol’ Mother Goose I’m talking about here but something quite different. And by different, I mean as macabre as heck with each of the ten meeting grisly fates, from getting burned up in the sun to living in Devon. No, I’m serious -- one of them ends up living in Devon.
I could rant on about the rhyme itself for some good ol’ comic relief but not right here.
With that out of the way, on with the actual story.
First of all, it sets the stage perfectly, with eight innocent strangers invited by a U.N. Owen to reside at a nice mansion on Soldier Island. Peculiar enough in each of the guest’s bedrooms there resides the Ten Little Soldier Boys rhyme mentioned before.
But before anyone takes a good long look at it, dinner (or tea time, or whatever they call it) is ready.
So they're just relishing in the fine dining when all the sudden out of the blue a voice known only as (wait for it) The Voice, calls out each of their “crimes” ranging from innocent accidental deaths ones with motives that are just ludicrous. After discussing the events that unfolded they attempt to calm down with a helping of Champagne, but one chokes from his meal which is later revealed to be laced with cyanide, eerily matching one of the first lines of the rhyme.
“one choked his little self and then there were nine.”
And this is why I don’t drink alcohol.
It only goes downhill from there, as both the body count and the level of suspense grow with each fatality; how’s that for a suspense novel!
Some say that a story is as only good as its characters. Boy does this story deliver on it. I have never encountered any novel since Stephen King’s The Stand where I genuinely cared about all the characters and what happened to them. There was one part in the story where I went: “NO, NOT HIM!!” but come on, It’s not like it wasn’t going to happen anyway. Another thing I admire about it is that every chapter itself is divided into sections marked with roman numerals, so it’s a lot easier to keep track of where I’m at rather than just trying to memorize the page. The pacing is nicely done as well and the moments of suspense are evenly plotted throughout with a little backstory and some nice character development filling in the blanks.
But by far one of the best aspects of the story is the ending. If the title hasn’t suggested to you already, the grim rhyme basically tells how the mystery starts and ends, and at said end, you’re left in fevered speculation as to who did it and why. But thankfully it does reveal it. At the very end, a fisherman comes across a classic message in a bottle containing a manuscript. In said manuscript, it reveals the killer’s motives and more importantly, the identity. The culprit had a fascination with crime and became obsessed with it. Also, he was dying of a disease so he thought as a last hurrah he would set the stage for an unsolvable murder mystery centered around the Ten Little Soldier Boys poem. Well there’s an issue with this otherwise ‘bright’ idea:
THE PUZZLE AIN’T UNSOLVABLE WHEN YOU’VE GOT THE ANSWER JUST FLOATING IN THE WATER!!!
As for the identity of the killer; how about I just keep you in suspense until and let you actually find out yourselves.
My grade overall: I’d give an A+; for apprehension
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